


Not Out of Time Yet

by Sandylee007



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Angst, Episode: s03e16 Stay With Me, Hurt Magnus Bane, M/M, Post-Episode: s03e15 To the Night Children, Romance, Sad Alec, Scared Alec Lightwood
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-31
Updated: 2019-03-31
Packaged: 2019-12-29 19:04:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,498
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18300167
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sandylee007/pseuds/Sandylee007
Summary: POST EPISODE 3x15                Alec has always been the type of a person who expects a disaster when things start to feel too good to be true. And before it even began a relationship with Magnus seemed like a disaster waiting to happen. Until their time together lulls Alec to a sense of security and his heart forgets to shield itself against a disaster for a moment. Which is when it comes, starting with an ominous trickle of blood.After Magnus collapses Alec can only hope and pray that they’re not out of time yet. That the timer in his head counting backwards to when things would inevitably crash and burn wouldn’t hit zero.





	Not Out of Time Yet

**Author's Note:**

> The ending of 3x15 hit roughly like a bullet to the heart. Because, seriously… From all that sweetness to sheer horror in less than five seconds? I’ll never get over the emotional whiplash! So, of course I had to type something like this.
> 
> DISCLAIMER: Yeeeeah… Checking my bank account after a recent holiday trip is believing. I still own nothing nor do I make profit out of typing these tales. Only immense emotional satisfaction gained.
> 
> WARNINGS: Feels. Yeah, definitely some of them. Lorenzo will be mentioned, so expect that you’ll want to punch something. Other than that… None.
> 
> Awkay… Are you ready? I’m not sure I am, but let’s go, anyway. I REALLY hope that you’ll enjoy the ride.

Alec wasn’t exactly a pessimist. (He preferred labeling himself a realist.) But he’d been taught to prepare himself for disasters, to always have a plan after a plan in case things went wrong. It was what made him a good leader. But sometimes it also made his life unnecessarily difficult. Because at some point he started anticipating those disasters in his life outside duty as well. Whenever things felt too good to be true he almost literally heard a click and a timer started in his head. Counting backwards to when everything would crash and burn.

It was especially difficult after he encountered a male warlock who provoked… a spark that absolutely shouldn’t have existed. Because a relationship between an immortal and a mortal, between a Shadowhunter and a Downworlder? That was the definition of a disaster waiting to happen.

So, the second Magnus introduced himself and a wildfire started in the confines of Alec’s ribcage, the young archer heard a far too familiar ‘click’.

Yet he called off his own wedding and kissed Magnus instead. Since then they fought, far too much, and too often Alec was to blame. They were tossed from one chaos to another at such speed that they almost forgot to go on their first date. At one point they even broke up. Magnus went to hell and Alec took an arrow to his chest. But somehow they always found their way back to each other.

And eventually Alec was lulled to a sense of security. To a point where he dared to ask Magnus to move in together again. He asked the man he loved to find a home for _them_ , which was even more intimate. And when Magnus said ‘yes’ with a half-joke and a smile of utter joy, Alec’s rejoicing heart forgot to shield itself against a disaster.

Which was when it finally came, starting with an ominous trickle of blood from Magnus’s nose.

Later Alec left Magnus’s side for less than an hour to go and confront Lorenzo Rey. He was furious, out for blood. He was desperate. Apparently he was also irritating enough to make the man lose his temper for long enough to make sure that he wouldn’t be the High Warlock much longer. By attacking the head of the Institute and refusing to help Lorenzo ensured that his days in the city and Magnus’s apartment were numbered. But whatever momentary satisfaction Alec obtained from the bittersweet victory faded when he returned to the infirmary.

Because he encountered Catarina, who had tears in her eyes. “Magnus, he… he had another seizure. It happened so fast…” She trailed off, anguish on her face. “Alec, I’m so sorry.”

Alec couldn’t breathe. Couldn’t think. Couldn’t process what he was hearing. He could only dash to where Magnus still lay, the monitor beside him switched off.

Magnus looked exactly like he did when Alec left. The archer was almost able to convince himself that nothing had changed. Until he pulled Magnus to his arms and held on tight, only to find no trace of life, fire or fight.

Magnus was gone. And Alec didn’t get the chance to say goodbye. He didn’t even get to say ‘I love you, too’.

The timer that’d been counting backwards in Alec’s head… It came to a violent stop. And his heart shattered to a million pieces while he held the hollow shell of his world.

/

Alec woke up to a loud and agonized shout. It took a long moment before he realized that the sound came from him. In fact, for a while very little made any sense to him.

Magnus… He was there, lay on a bed right in front of him. The very much active monitor keeping an eye on the warlock still said ‘condition critical’. According to Catarina things should start to stabilize soon. (Should, should, should…) Now that Magnus’s body no longer had to fight against the magic bought from Lorenzo, at the cost of his home and dignity.

As the last thing Magnus got the chance to do with that magic he saved someone’s life. Alec wondered if Lorenzo himself had ever sincerely, honestly helped anyone but himself. The thought brought a bitter taste to the young man’s mouth.

Unfair, all of this.

But at least Magnus was still alive. The horrible dream Alec had… It was just that, at least partially. When he came back from confronting Rey Magnus’s condition had taken a turn for the worse but he was still fighting.

The timer in Alec’s mind was still ticking because they still had time left. Time to make more lasting memories. Time to build a future together. Time to make a home for themselves, with a walk-in closet and all. (Magnus had always asked for so little and Alec would be damned if he didn’t give the man he loved it all.)

Finally Alec began to feel a little more coherent. Which was when he realized that he’d grabbed Magnus’s hand and was squeezing it with what had to be a painful amount of force. He loosened his grip immediately, guilt slashing sharply. “Sorry, I’m sorry…! I didn’t mean to hurt you.” He raised his beloved’s terrifyingly limp, cold hand to his lips and gave it a kiss. “I just… I had a bad dream.” His voice broke pathetically and he used his free hand to wipe his eyes. “I… I hope you have better ones. They must be, if it’s taking you this long to wake up.” He sounded sad and perhaps a little accusative. So vulnerable that he would’ve hated it if it was anyone else he was talking to.

Alec jumped and was somehow able to tense up further, his protective instincts flaring, when running steps approached. He didn’t relax much even after peering over his shoulder to see Jace, who’d obviously just woken up and had a frantic look in his eyes. (The look also held guilt. He didn’t think his parabatai would ever stop blaming himself for… this. Alec knew the feeling all too well.) “I… I felt your panic, and I thought…” The blond trailed off, unwilling to squeeze out the rest. Jace’s eyes strayed towards Magnus, to see the man still holding on, and their shared relief soothed them both. Only a little, but it was consolation nonetheless.

Alec swallowed laboriously. “Just a nightmare.” (This whole thing was one, really. But at least the worst hadn’t actually come to pass.) For a second, three, ten, he simply breathed, relieved that Jace didn’t try to coax him to talk. Then the archer came to think of something. “The bag with Magnus’s clothes… Can you give it to me?” He would’ve fetched it himself. But now that he’d finally dared to take Magnus’s hand… He couldn’t bring himself to let go.

Jace nodded, visibly glad to be of use. Seeing Magnus’s outfit inside the plastic bag, Alec felt a thud of ache. It was one of his favorites and now it’d be forever tainted by his worst memory so far. As well as a few droplets of blood.

Pushing away that thought determinedly, Alec gave Jace a nod of thank you. Then used his free hand to rummage through the bag’s contents. Reaching Magnus’s pants, he searched first one pocket, then another. For a second or two panic nearly surged until he found what he’d been looking for. A fresh set of uninvited tears blurred his eyes when he pulled out the _omamori_ charm as gently as he could.

Luck and protection… Fat lot good it’d ever done to give Magnus either of those. But Alec figured that the reason why his boyfriend still carried it with him everywhere was far less superstitious.

A couple of tears rolled when Alec placed the precious item lovingly on Magnus’s palm, then closed the man’s fingers around it. To make sure that the treasure wouldn’t be dropped the archer also covered the older man’s fingers with all his ten. And in that moment his whole world fit into his hands.

That was when Jace left, unwilling to intrude any further. Alec didn’t notice. Nor was he aware that by then he was crying openly. All he saw was Magnus’s face, which he found ridiculously beautiful, vulnerable and young without all the warpaint. “Do you feel this?” he inquired, his voice raspy and barely above a whisper. “I don’t know what you’re dreaming of, but… You have to wake up, now.” He risked tightening his grip slightly when he got no reaction. “We’re not out of time. Not yet, not when we’ve barely had the chance to be together. So I… I need you to make it back to me again.” By the time he went on there was barely anything left of his voice. “Magnus, please, wake up. Because… It doesn’t matter where we’ll live. You’re my home.”

Perhaps it was all his imagination, but Alec could’ve sworn that Magnus’s fingers twitched ever so slightly.

**Author's Note:**

> Who wants to believe that Alec didn’t imagine the twitch? (lifts both hands) Seriously, Magnus, please just wake up!
> 
> Soooo… Thoughts? Comments? PLEASE, do leave a comment before you go! Hearing from you ALWAYS brightens my day.
> 
> Thank you, so much, for reading! And who knows. Maybe our paths will cross again?
> 
> Take care!


End file.
